In celebration of copyeditors
A guest post by Kathy Bradshaw
I am copyeditor—guardian of grammar, hero of homonyms, ruler over redundancy, crusader of clarity. I’m a savior of all those grandmas who would be eaten if a single comma went astray. I swoop in to rescue the world from wordiness and to rid us all of run-ons. I destroy double negatives and eradicate excess exclamation points!
Armed with a style guide and The Elements of Style, I am a warrior constantly going to battle: who vs. whom, your vs. you’re, that vs. which, like vs. as. I see to it that every modifier is in its place, every clause is punctuated, and no voice is passive; I make it my personal mission to ensure that all constructions are parallel and every subject and verb dance together in perfect harmony. It’s a constant debate when to hyphenate, eliminate, or subordinate, and I must regularly deliberate how to conjugate.
Just between you and me, I really am silently correcting your grammar, and sometimes not so silently. I must lay down the laws of the English language so that when I lie down at night, I can sleep well knowing that the world is a much more grammatically correct and coherent place. I literally hate it when people misuse words.
Not everyone likes me because I’m one of those people who points out every mistake you’ve ever made. In fact, it’s my job to look for you to mess up. When you say something wrong, I correct you. I draw attention to the errors of your way—and of your prose. But you will thank me later when your text is so smooth and easy that it’s almost as if it’s being narrated by Barry White.
I am copyeditor. And I’m the one about whom your mother warned you.
Writer, editor, and grammar fanatic Kathy Bradshaw has written and edited for a variety of publications and websites, including serving as executive editor for Where Y’at Magazine in New Orleans. She has won numerous awards for her writing from both Writer’s Digest and the New Orleans Press Club. Bradshaw earned her master’s degree in English (Professional Writing concentration) from the University of New Orleans and lives in Chattanooga, Tennessee, with her pet crawfish and a cat named Comma.
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