How to write concisely
As an instructor for Writer’s Digest University, I teach copyediting courses, and one aspect of editing that many find tricky to grasp is how to create concise writing. Concise writing clearly expresses itself in the fewest number of words. Because it doesn’t carry any baggage, it speeds along the page. In this way, it makes for enjoyable, easy reading.
But how is it achieved? Simply put, as you self-edit you’ll have to keep an eye out for a multitude of infractions. You may even find it necessary to read the copy more than once before you’ve whittled it down to the bare bones.
1. Seek out “ly” words and eliminate most of them. Vastly, hugely, highly, remarkably …. Many times these “ly” words do nothing but take up space. Instead, try to find stronger verbs that impart the same meaning.
I ate my food quickly. BETTER AS: I inhaled my food.
She really wanted to see him. BETTER AS: She longed to see him.
She spoke tiredly. BETTER AS: She muttered.
2. Rid the copy of redundant words.
Free gift (a gift is always free)
End result (the result always comes at the end)
Personal opinion (all opinions are personal to the one who has them)
Great abundance (abundance by definition is a large/great amount)
First and foremost (two words that mean the same thing)
Always and forever (two more words that mean the same thing)
3. Avoid using “got.” You can usually find a more specific verb.
And then I got a job as a ….BETTER AS: And then I landed a job as a ….
She got sick after that … BETTER AS: She caught a cold after that. OR She contracted the German measles after that.
He finally got going on the project. BETTER AS: He finally began work on the project.
4. Delete “There is/There are” at the start of the sentence. When you do, you’ll usually end up using a stronger verb.
There is a large portion of the country that vacations every year. BETTER AS: A large portion of the country vacations each year.
There are examples at the end of the chapter. BETTER AS: Examples are found at the end of the chapter.
There are people who would rather not watch the movie. BETTER AS: Some people would rather not watch the movie.
5. Use verbs rather than nouns to express action.
The adolescent is in need of an attitude adjustment. BETTER AS: The adolescent needs to adjust her attitude.
The intention of the professor was to make the class more interesting. BETTER AS: The professor intended to make the class more interesting.
6. Eliminate filler words such as very, really, commonly, slightly, totally, actually… Also, “up” in “stand up” and “down” in “sit down.”
A girl that I know… BETTER AS: A girl I know.
She is definitely a good writer. BETTER AS: She is a talented writer.
All of the family will be there. BETTER AS: The whole family will be there.
7. Keep an eye out for wordy phrases.
He is a man who …. He …
This is a belief that …. This belief…
The reason why …. Because
Because of the fact … Because
In the event of …. If
8. Passive vs. Active Language.
The game was played by Steve. BETTER AS: Steve played the game.
The bank was owed a ten dollar fee. BETTER AS: She owed the back a ten dollar fee.
Her fans were entertained by her impromptu reading. BETTER AS: She entertained her fans with an impromptu reading.
In the poem, it is suggested that ….BETTER AS: The poem suggests ...
9. Put negative constructions in the positive
She does not often arrive early to parties. BETTER AS: She usually arrives late to parties.
I don’t disagree with you. BETTER AS: I agree with you.
Is it not true that they won the last baseball game? BETTER AS: Did they win the last baseball game?
Are all of these hard and fast rules? Does this mean you can never use the word “very” or “really” in your writing again? No, I wouldn’t go that far. But if you use such words often, and you allow yourself a wordy style, it will clutter your work. Put these tips to the test: take a sample of your work-in-progress and search for the nine issues mentioned above. When you’ve eradicated all that you can eradicate, read through it again. I’m betting you’ll like the difference you see.
Kim Catanzarite is the author of the award-winning Jovian Universe sci-fi thriller series. She is a freelance writer and editor for publishers and independent authors, and she teaches copyediting for Writer’s Digest University. Her Self-Publishing 101 blog discusses the ins and outs of indie life as well as all things writing craft. Kim lives on the east coast USA with her husband and daughter.
